I have read several of Dr. Bernie Siegal's books on healing. He refers to the concept of a "spiritual flat tire" as those bumps in the road that delay us but need not stop us completely. No only have I found dis-ease to fall in this, but life happens that creates job challenges, relationships issues, financial crisis or maybe just a puncture in your tire. Life's Challenges Have you ever been on the way somewhere and all of a sudden you come to a construction zone? If you live in Edmonton, this is normal at this time of year, and it drives people mad. Cars are lined up, traffic is crazy and frustration sets in as you realize you will not make it to your destination on time. Do you curse the City of Edmonton, do you start biting your nails with anxiety? I do both of these by the way…until I stop the inner chatter and accept that it is out of my hands and there may be a good reason for my delay. I turn up the music, send a text or call and say " I will be late." We may never know why these bumps in the road, construction zones, missed flights, lost luggage show up for us. Just maybe, there is a reason, maybe one we will never know. ...

Whether it is your life or a painting or hobby, worrying about the details can create stress that is not needed. The old term, nothing is worth doing unless you do it well is overrated. Sometimes just doing it...can be good enough.

What is the No. 1 regret of hospice patients in their dying days? “They wished they would have lived life the way they wanted to, not the way others wanted them to,” says Kathie Truitt, author of The Hillbilly Debutante Café (www.hillbillydebutante.blogspot.com), quoting an article by former palliative care worker Bronnie Ware.

Words are powerful, so much so that a few words can hurt or heal a relationship. Even the relationship you have with yourself. Be careful with the words you choose as once they are said, they can not be taken back.

Remember finger painting? A clean sheet of paper and paint squishing between your fingers. Swirling bold colours, smooth flowing texture and your amazing natural ability as a human being to create. You probably didn’t think too much about how good your picture needed to be or whether you had any talent. You just had fun and got wrapped up in the process – the process of creating. When you were done, you were likely pretty satisfied with the result. It didn’t really matter anyway because you knew there was always another opportunity to get your hands dirty again. Just like finger painting, your life is an ongoing creative project. It’s bold, colourful, tactile, sensual and yes, sometimes a little messy. And like finger painting, there is always another opportunity to get a new sheet of paper and begin to create – or recreate – again. Creativity is a Critical Element...

I hope I am an original, this was something I struggled with for many years. I really did not know who I was until I hit my mid-forties. Holy Cow, that took a long time. People would say “just be yourself”. I would pretend to get it, but I didn’t, what the heck did that mean? For me, it was always, what do others want me to be.  How can I fit in, how can I be invisible so I won’t be noticed. Well, that is another story for another day. Self Esteem For those of you lucky to have great self-esteem, you will think this is odd, but I know many of you out there understand? Am I right? As a woman who was born in the late 50’s, being yourself, original, unique to the world, was not something that was embraced. Being different is still challenging, teenagers...

Many of you were at the Fabulous@50 Experience on November 5th, I hope you had fun, I did. This event for baby boomer women, consumes my time, all year round, almost like planning a wedding. So if I were to count them, I would say I have planned 5 weddings now, oops I am off topic….I am a little ADD. Now is that bad? I guess it depends on how you choose to look at it. Strengths vs Weaknesses If you have ever been in a conversation with me you will notice I am easily distracted, probably the reason Wayne Lee has never hypnotized me, I don't stay in any place for long, especially in my head long enough to be hypnotized. One of my best qualities, but also the one I have struggled...

In all my articles and on my website, I refer to the fabulous@50 demographic as “baby boomers”. But what are baby boomers? Where have our values and beliefs come from? In Ontario, one influential attempt to define the boom came from David Foot, author of Boom, Bust and Echo: Profiting from the Demographic Shift in the 21st Century, published in 1997 and 2000. He defines a Canadian boomer as someone born from 1947 to 1966, the years that more than 400,000 babies were born. In my last blog post I talked about baby boomers retiring, we are getting ready to go on to the next opportunity or experience. We may have worked for many years and are ready to retire from that profession, but ready to move on to another. Maybe it...

When I was single and in my 40's, I told my friends, I was looking for a relationship with a nice easy flow, a give and receive relationship, where conflict was not the main event. What I found interesting is how many of my single friends were looking for a partner who challenged them. Don't get me wrong, I wanted a partner who had an opinion, but I was not longer looking for a challenging man to deal with. Last weekend I was in Canmore for the Folk Fest and decided to duck out  for a nice long walk along the river. As I was standing on a bridge, looking over the railing at the river, I thought of the term " going with the flow".  While I was watching the river, I realized that even when you are going with the flow or with the current, there will still be challenges. There may be a big rock, a fallen branch or something even...

We've have all heard the saying " hard work pays off". Never before has that meant more to me than this last month. Over the last 3 to 4 years, I have been busy, busy, busy working on Fabulous@50, building a vibrant website, growing the Fabulous@50 community and working on the growth of the annual trade show. I admit, there has been times, where I have wondered if I was on the right path. This last month has truly shown me that I am...whooohoooo!!!

One of my bucket list items was to meet Wayne Dyer and I did it! I went to the Hay House "I Can Do It Conference" in Vancouver and had a picture taken with Wayne. It is such a bad picture of me, but I didn't care, I was thrilled to be there. It was a double pleasure, as I also got to spend some time with my son who lives in Victoria. First about the conference, every speaker was so good, there was a spiritual and weight loss theme about the event, which I liked. My only disappointment was the seating arrangements, I thought that people attending this conference would be of higher consciousness and would not create such havoc every time we left the room. Unless you held your seat, someone, in their infinite wisdom would try to get closer to the stage and would take it. Which of course caused a ripple effect. To me it seemed so simple, stay put and everything would go smoother and less chaotic.

Boundaries are fences that you set up for yourself. Setting boundaries in our businesses and personal lives can often be difficult when you are use to giving so much of yourself. You are not obligated to set boundaries but you must for your own personal sanity and health. There is always something that needs to get done. You must look after yourself in order to look after others. Some people say that setting boundaries seems like you are closing yourself off from others but this is further from the truth.

I am one of those people that would rather not eat, than indulge in crappy fast food. But the other night, I received a text from my daughter with a request for a cheeseburger. Amber is 25 and decided it was a good idea to come to my house and demand dinner. And because I knew she had been out the night before and was in need of some fatty food to make her feel better, I gave in and made stop at Harveys. LOL.

When was the last time you did something for someone else totally unexpected,with absolutely no expectations in return? It is so wonderful to have it done for you, but doing something for others is so much better. I tend to be one that sees what can be done and in the past have done it, to the point that is started to be expected of me. What I was missing was boundaries and the realization of why I was doing so much. Here it is, I am a recovering people pleaser, I still love to help others, but I have to resist doing too much.

My love of Wayne Dyer started in 1998 when I was sent a set of tapes (yes I said tapes) about Manifesting Your Destiny. I had just gone through a major back surgery, and did not have much to do but read, watch TV and listen to music or tapes. And there is only so much I can take when it comes to daytime TV. My sister-in-law, in her infinite wisdow, knew I was going through tough times and sent me the tapes from California.

One of the things I say on a regular basis is "Stretch, do something you are uncomfortable doing." I started this practice about 10 years ago, and as hard as it is to step out of that comfortie place on the sofa, I am given the opportunity to participate doing this on a regular basis. This year I have already got myself into (I mean agreed to do a few interesting challenges) LOL.

As we look past at last year and look ahead for the New Year, we are filled with many emotions. This is a great time to evaluate how far you have come and look ahead to where you are going. Here are some questions to ask yourself for reflection:

During a long walk last week, the first in a very long time, I had some time to clear my head of all the planning and details that I feel the need to go over and over in my head. I started to think about my November 7th tradefair and my motivation for putting it on. I feel so blessed to be at the place in my life with a clear vision of what my passion is, and the reason I am here is because I took some risks and stepped outside of my comfort zone. I began to think about how difficult it is for people to let go of the past, sometimes there is comfort in holding on to their baggage. As I was thinking of this, I realized how at the other side of this, is that so few of us enjoy being in the moment. We are here and we wish to be there, then poof, the moment is gone. Guilty.... I am so busy DOING, that I forget to BE. This is a lesson I have learned before, but one that is obviously...

The last few week's has been filled with numerous opportunities for growth and self discovery....will it ever stop. The answer to that is a big NO. There is a life lesson at every corner. My sister-in-law Connie is in town, moving her husband's mother out of her cozy home and into a senior's home. It is such a tough time for everyone. This feisty lady is 90 years old and is still very witty, she cracked me up. She made a comment that everyone at this senior's home was so old and told us she should look for a millionaire boyfriend. Her body may be old, but her spirit is still young and feisty. While I was there, I began to picture myself sitting in that wheelchair as an old woman. All my ego gone, relying on others for my care. Will I feel I had lived my life to the fullest, had I made a difference to someone, did I share my gifts and live my dreams. See where I am going with...

There is so much talk about finding your passion, stepping out of your comfort zone...etc, etc. What does all that really mean? Some people are very good at taking risks and staying positive through the challenges. Then there are the people who think that if you do what you are passionate about, it will be easy, comfortable, a natural process. It can be, but don't be fooled you will be challenged and you may even fail. The growth is in the challenges, can you overcome them and what do you learn from them? Your self-esteem and self-confidence will be tested, but the beautiful part is the growth that happens when you come through it. It is so important to believe in what you are doing and why you are doing it. A friend of mine told me recently that the most important thing is to know who you are and what your intention is. I get asked all the time, why I do what I do with Fabulous@50 and sometimes I really don't know what to say. It is obviously my passion and I am challenged constantly. I get great pleasure in seeing other people happy and seeing the personal growth....

 

Time Is On Your Side. Do You Use It Wisely? I’m not a Fabulous@50 woman – never was and never will be.  Maybe I’m a Fabulous@50 guy and yet, there are many commonalities between us.

For example, it has been said, “as time passes we gain wisdom.”  Have you got time for some gender-neutral wisdom about time – wisdom that you can use to enhance every second of your existence? What is Time?

Time is a strange thing we’ve invented so things don’t all happen at once. Try as I have, I haven’t figured out how to manage Time.  All I can do is manage what I do with my time and that’s where things get tricky for me.  I bet it’s the same for you, isn’t it?

If we’re not conscious about what we do with our time, we can create all kinds of havoc and we may destroy our relationships with self and others, and blame it all on Time.

Here are examples.

Quite some time ago, I had a 10:00 am appointment in Edmonton.  I calculated backwards to ensure that I could get necessary...

By Charmaine Hammond & Debra Kasowski

Passion-driven women in the workplace and in our communities will have a better chance of survival during any economical climate when the level of passion and connection to purpose is high. Passion for what you do creates an energy that propels you to take action and think progressively. In fact, it has a positive contagion factor, like a stone in the water creating ripples, passion does the same thing. This passion is ignited in the people who you serve. They want to do business with you and associate with you because of the person you are and the experience you give them when they do business with you. Customers that are fueled with your passion are committed to your mission and values and will continue to do business with you. The same applies to the communities and groups you may volunteer with and support. When you bring passion and a sense of purpose to your group and volunteer efforts, it inspires and connects others. To re-ignite your passion and make...

In midlife we often start asking ourselves some really big questions.

Things like:

What is my life purpose?

How do I make a difference in the world?

Who am I?

Questions like that are wonderful explorations. And they can also feel overwhelming. Deep personal reflection needs to be balanced with the simple joys of life. Sometimes during a coaching call the most off handed comments produce the best wisdom. Recently one of my long time clients was discussing different perspectives on the next few months of her life. As we played with a number of ideas, she casually mentioned a bumper sticker that she had seen:

What if the hokey pokey IS what it's all about?

That led to a great coaching conversation about how she would approach things if the hokey pokey was really what life was all about. Do you remember doing the hokey pokey when you were a kid? Just a silly little dance you did for fun.

What would you do differently?

It is so easy to get wrapped up in the details and...